2.27.2013
i vote for the andorpersand
7.18.2011
Monday funny
One of the places we take I-25 to visit is the REI Flagship Store. (Coolest facility ever? I think maybe so.) We don't go to REI terribly often, but we go there enough to be familiar with the sights we'll see on the way. Including the occasional stunning vista or two.
But purple mountain majesty aside, I think my favorite thing to see along 25 is the shed warehouse.
Storage, we all know, is a booming industry. My rental house sports a separate 2 car garage along with an additional (empty) shed. My neighbors one one side have a separate 2-car garage as well as a driveway where they like to store their stuff. My neighbors on the other side have three sheds, two of which are 12x20! Every other property adjacent to my little rental has at least one shed, sometimes two or three. Sheds abound. Lots of sheds. Sheds everywhere.
Not that that has anything to do with I like the shed warehouse. I like the shed warehouse simply because of the business name.
Tough Shed.
Oh yes. This place is called Tough Shed and I love it. Specifically, I love saying the business name out loud as we pass it. Sometimes I'll say it loudly. Sometimes I'll mutter it. You never know, with me. But it makes Brian do a 'say-whaaaa?' every time, because for some reason he is surprised by it. Every time.
Nothing gives this recovering fundie the jollies like a 'sounds like profanity' moment.
(Also, Mom, sorry I said hell the other day.)
4.06.2011
an etsy item you should see
I needed a new glasses case. And I found one. From this shop. And I love it.
Check it:
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| photo by WickedStella |
You can see his brother here.
Check it out. You will laugh. And maybe you will buy your own? (Note: there's nothing in it for me.)
Besides, it's almost Easter. And I'm pretty sure Jesus is the closest thing to 'zombie' this world will ever see.
4.04.2011
attitude of gratitude
This return policy, though, it's pretty nice. But I recently found something that could add a whole new dimension, making said policy even more effective.
Behold, the Gift Complaint Form.
It's cute, though at first glance the notion of complaining about a gift is off-putting. But it reminds me of the feedback forms at the college dining hall, so nostalgia mitigates the otherwise-unwelcome pang of complaining about gifts.
Plus, the serious and official format and middle-schooler language of an already fairly ridiculous concept makes it funny to me. It could be an interesting surprise response to a gag gift, too. Or it could be a gag itself! I'm giggling at the thought of my brother receiving one of these in the mail from me (in 'response' to a fictitious gift, maybe?).
My birthday isn't very far away, but I don't plan to be using this form in any serious manner. Still, it's kinda fun to look at, right? (Though if any kid of mine submitted one to me, things would not go well for said kid.)
12.29.2010
Some things I'd like to do in 2011
But this coming new year feels a little different to me. I've begun to think about what 2011 could mean for me, professionally, individually and maritally. I have a lot of ideas. And what happens when I get a lot of ideas? I make lists.
Home/Work Life
I'm back at home, with a vision for what being 'at home' means to me. Taking care of my home and my little family - me included - has become important to me. Yes, these are things that I've always valued and felt drawn toward, but right now I am feeling an urge to prioritize home life - to devote my energy and a large part of my days to holding down the fort. Sustaining this is also important to me. I want to find some work this year, yes, but I know now that I want to be working from home. Freelancing is an obvious first step in that direction, as is looking for work-from-home positions. I may also look at smaller side hustles like Etsy. And I have a few other small and medium projects on file too - mostly involving liquidation of assets (in other words, I'll be in charge of selling our car, our spare washer and dryer, and some high-end clothing that it turns out I like to look at but never wear).
To that end, there are some specific things I think I'd like to do this year:
- Finish unpacking from our move 3 months ago, for the love of Pete
- Set up the 'man cave' so that it looks like an actual man cave, and not a girly collection of miscellany (first step: get a rug that isn't pink and swirly)
- Repaint the guest bathroom (and take down the wooden hand-painted shells tacked on the walls...)
- Revamp my ailing professional website. Maybe even come up with a logo (gasp!) And then put the she-bang to use.
- Flex my bulky but unused social media muscles.
- Find a nice balance of minimalism/simplicity and organized abundance at home.
- Bake consistently good bread. Primary targets include sandwich bread that Brian will eat, and dinner rolls.
- Reach for healthful snacks and lunches more often than less good options.
- Grow, and then eat, something. Maybe a few different kinds of somethings.
And then I'm reminded: we have student loans. And maybe we should focus on paying those down faster, not on taking these trips everywhere. And there are other things we need to be thinking about too, like retirement accounts (uh...we don't really have those yet) and saving up to pay cash for a car in the event that we need one (the Highlander is coming up on 10 years old). It will probably be a while before it would make sense for us to buy a house (have you priced houses in Denver lately?) so a down payment is not even on the radar yet. We live below our means and build our general savings every month on top of the Israel trip savings, but is that good enough? This is the year to figure it out.
So with all of that rambled said, the third prong of things to do in 2011 is as follows:
- Fund Israel trip with cash - enough cash to bring home a really special thing or two
- Take one other trip in the fall
- Contribute to Brian's 403(b) and open an IRA for me
- Develop a budget that both of us can stand, and stick to it
- Take a class in something. ballet, pottery and foreign language are top contenders
- Dig into my 'special' yarn and fabric stashes and start making things with them
- Make butter and see if it's worth it
- Get someone else to help me decorate (any volunteers?)
- Make curtains for the tall, skinny, off-center window over the bed
- Read 52 books - one for each week of the year. Unless it turns out I read more than 52 books this year, in which case, read more books this year than last year.
11.12.2010
workisms
Today, I'm going to share a recent one with you.
I am one of three admins where I work, and I share 'technology' responsibilities with another person. I am generally, though not always, the most tech-savvy of our staff of 7.
So when a coworker got off the phone after having what was apparently a very confused conversation with someone, naturally I dropped in. She, my coworker, was trying to get him, the guy on the other end of the phone, to bring her an electronic copy of a document or presentation or something when they were meeting the following week. (This, and not emailing the file to her, made sense in the context.)
He wasn't sure what she meant.
She explained that she needed him to bring the files with him, not just a paper copy but the files, stored on something, so that they could be loaded into the system at the site.
That's when he asked if she meant he should bring the documents on his flash pod.
We decided that we thought he was talking about a thumb drive. And I thought that calling it a 'flash pod' was endlessly amusing.
Which is why I no longer carry a thumb drive. I carry a flash pod.
What's your best workism?
*Remind me to tell you about the erotic Norwegian love poetry sometime.
8.17.2010
good moods
I am in a good mood right now.
Know why?
I got me some new shoes.
That's right. Check these babies out.
AND, I got them on clearance.
Awwwwww yeahhhhhhhh.
Do you have an instant pick-me-up you like to employ when necessary? What are your favorite shoes right now?
6.16.2010
Lists of Five
- Zooey Deschanel
- My mom's mom
- Harper Lee
- Michael W. Smith
- Heidi Klum
- I like my high, veiny former dancer arches
- Hair
- Ability to nap when it's too hot
- Nebulous blue/green/brown eye color
- hourglass figure! it's jumbo-sized right now, but it's there!
- Tornadoes
- Dying in a fire
- Roaches
- and Spiders
- Melanoma
- To Kill a Mockingbird
- Redeeming Love
- Princess Bride
- Simple Abundance
- The American Heritage Dictionary (I love etymology!)
- Brian
- Marcus (my brother)
- Backstreet Boys
- anybody with a Scottish accent
- "every person ever on tv or the radio" according to Brian
- Cried about how much I hated my life
- Cried about how much I hated my job
- Played the pirates game on facebook
- Called my friend in another office so that we could both look busy and unavailable without actually being busy or unavailable
- Made a meal plan for a week and a giant massive shopping list
- (so) meaty
- quixotic
- resplendent
- poop-brained
- stupid
- Water-borne diseases
- Muscle spasms
- Temperatures above 85 degrees wherever it is that I happen to be
- Abusive fundamentalism
- Cancer
- A pretty singing voice
- 4-limb independence
- Willpower
- More papillons
- A mortgage
- Give me chocolate
- Give me challah
- Buy me books
- Give me fabric and/or yarn
- Did I mention chocolate?
- Bowling
- Sewing
- Re-telling jokes and funny stories
- Dog ownership
- Walking
- allez cuisine!
- whatever
- your mom goes to college
- dude!
- your turn
- copy editor for the New Yorker
- city dweller
- friend of a famous person
- wedding gown saleswoman
- book shop owner
- hike into the woods and camp for a week
- publish something
- study Russian
- own a bmw 3 series
- see Japan
What's on your list?
5.24.2010
Wedding Vows
In bible study the other night, one of the ladies mentioned a new take on the old wedding vow - promising to be together for 'as long as we both shall love' - which, to me, sucks. There are so many comments I could make about that particular cop-out of choice, none of them nice. So I'll refrain.
Really though, a lot of 'we wrote our vows' vows are pretty lame, as far as I've experienced. Weak, and ignorant, and stupid. Maybe I should tell you how I really feel.
I was over at Flora's blog daydreaming about a succulent wall when I spotted these DIY wedding vows, and I have to admit, I think they're pretty cute. Not for me, and probably not 'solemn vow before God and all our loved ones' vows for a church wedding, but cute nonetheless.
“Jonathan: I vow to love you
Kestrin: I vow to love you
J: to respect you
K: to always make fun
J: to be your best friend ever
K: to constantly generate a force field of awesome to guide and protect us
J: to do what I love
K: to actively maintain our relationship
J: to be lucky
K: to live a charmed life
J: to live as long as possible
K: to ask nicely for what i need
J: to communicate my feelings effectively
K: to live a life of hilarious bliss together
J: to provide for you
K: to solve problems
J: to make time for you every single day
J: to remain curious
K: to stand by my man
J: to put our relationship first
K: to build a community around us
J: to build a family life together
K: to give you babies
J: to change the diapers on those babies
K: to be great parent
J: to sing with you in the morning
K: to give you shoulder rubs, intermittently, for as long as we both shall live
J: to remember how lucky I am
K: to rock out with our great grandchildren
J: to take you on one hundred honeymoons
K: to maintain a menagerie
J: to clean up
K: to sing songs to you
J: to speak for you when you sing your voice out
K: to throw radical parties
J: to be faithful to you
K: to take joy in doing nice things for you
J: to be compassionate
K: to be devoted
J: to be committed
K: to be happy
J: to listen to you
K: to support you
J: to stay with you forever
K: Do you vow to be my husband?
J: I do. Do you vow to be my wife?
K: I do.”
Your turn. What's your take on wedding vows? Did you/would you write your own? What do you think about vowing to stay married for 'as long as we both shall love'? Do you think wedding vows have anything to do with God? Fire away!
5.19.2010
Oh Happy Day!
Rejoicing and dancing and gladness, begin!!
Also, let the consumption of cake begin!
And chocolate. Because no celebration is complete without chocolate.
4.06.2010
The “Is that contestant on American Idol a Christian?" Scorecard
12.18.2009
daily drop cap
o you know about the Daily Drop Cap blog? If not, you're in for a treat. The blog itself has a pretty useful intro, so I'm pulling this description from there rather than reinvent this particular wheel: The Daily Drop Cap is an ongoing project by typographer and illustrator Jessica Hische. Each day (or at least each WORK day), a new hand-crafted decorative initial cap will be posted for your enjoyment and for the beautification of blog posts everywhere.
essica's letters are so much fun to look at. They lend themselves to all kinds of ideas for home decorating, gifts, and even blog redesigns! There's a pretty good chance that a letter or two of hers might end up in my home, framed as artwork. She's gone through the alphabet more than once, so there is fun to be had over and over again.
f you're into typography, design, or letters in general, go have a look here. You won't regret it.
11.27.2009
a big announcement from the western homefront
Her name is Aurora, but she goes by Rory. She is a beautiful three-month-old brown package of piddle border collie and I am investing in a Bissell Spot Shot very very soon to save the carpet. When we brought her home, she was about the same size as Eli, but a little taller and with a bigger head. She outgrew him overnight. She still looks like a stuffed animal, though.
Her name, Aurora, comes from a town in the Denver Metro area, where we will probably be spending a lot of our time since our Denver neighborhood shares a border with Aurora. She is not named after Rory Gilmore.
(Brian didn't go for my suggestion that we name her Aurora Borealis and call her Rory-Bory.) (Sometimes I call her Rory-Bory anyway.) (UPDATE: Brian came around.)
10.29.2009
Lou Gehrig on night baseball
Many months ago, I came across a fun interview that Lou did with a guy named Dwight Merriam, of KROC. They talked about all kinds of basebally subjects, but this one comment on night baseball games struck me as odd in a funny kind of way. There was a shift in the days of the Great Depression from baseball games being played in the daytime to being played at night, made possible by electricity and made necessary by dwindling spectatorship. Playing at night meant that folks who worked during the day could come to the evening games, and ticket sales were (as always) important. The first night baseball game was played in 1935, but it didn't really take off until after the war. The Chicaco Cubs were the lone daytime holdout for decades, and they didn't install lights at Wrigley until 1988.
While fans seemed to take to night baseball pretty quickly, a lot of the people IN baseball didn't like the change. As a self-professed analog person in a digital world, I totally 'get' an innate resistance to change brought on by technology, and some of the major arguments from 80 years ago are tinged with quaint antique notions. For example, one major worry was that players would have a hard time shifting betweein lighting conditions and that there would be more injuries during night games (per this site).
Want to know what Lou Gehrig thought? Read this excerpt from that 1939 interview, and keep in mind that Gehrig and the Yankees lost their first night game, in Philadelphia, prior to this interview. (Note: I've put my favorite comment in bold.)
Dwight Merriam, KROC: Lou, what's your opinion of night baseball?
Lou Gehrig: Well, night baseball is strictly a show and is strictly advantageous to the owners' pocketbook. But as far as being a true exhibition of baseball, well, I don't think I can say it is, and it's very difficult on the ballplayers themselves. Of course, we realize that the men who work in the daytime like to get out at night and really see a spectacle, and we do all in our power to give them their money's worth. But after all, it's not really baseball. Real baseball should be played in the daytime, in the sunshine.
I love baseball. I don't really 'follow' it, I don't know many players and I can only tell you the Phillies won the world series last year because one of my best friends is a hardcore fan. It was a long time before I'd return to a stadium or even watch a game after the big players strick in the 90s. But I sure do love going to stadiums, especially major league stadiums, and it doesn't take much for me to get caught up in the traditions of our national pastime.
10.22.2009
the road trip with no predetermined destination, revisited
Brian said this made him sad, because there IS a predetermined destination. My thought was, yes ultimately you're aiming for somewhere, but that doesn't mean you have to go STRAIGHT there, hence it's an unplanned road trip! Same thing, right?
Brian said that you're supposed to just go and 'see where the road takes you.' I have no idea what that means.
Apparently, I have nary a spontaneous bone in my body.
9.23.2009
real and true happiness

9.14.2009
how now
9.02.2009
Marginalia, by Billy Collins
Marginalia
Sometimes the notes are ferocious,
skirmishes against the author
raging along the borders of every page
in tiny black script.
If I could just get my hands on you,
Kierkegaard, or Conor Cruise O'Brien,
they seem to say,
I would bolt the door and beat some logic into your head.
Other comments are more offhand, dismissive -
"Nonsense." "Please!" "HA!!" -
that kind of thing.
I remember once looking up from my reading,
my thumb as a bookmark,
trying to imagine what the person must look like
why wrote "Don't be a ninny"
alongside a paragraph in The Life of Emily Dickinson.
Students are more modest
needing to leave only their splayed footprints
along the shore of the page.
One scrawls "Metaphor" next to a stanza of Eliot's.
Another notes the presence of "Irony"
fifty times outside the paragraphs of A Modest Proposal.
Or they are fans who cheer from the empty bleachers,
Hands cupped around their mouths.
"Absolutely," they shout
to Duns Scotus and James Baldwin.
"Yes." "Bull's-eye." "My man!"
Check marks, asterisks, and exclamation points
rain down along the sidelines.
And if you have managed to graduate from college
without ever having written "Man vs. Nature"
in a margin, perhaps now
is the time to take one step forward.
We have all seized the white perimeter as our own
and reached for a pen if only to show
we did not just laze in an armchair turning pages;
we pressed a thought into the wayside,
planted an impression along the verge.
Even Irish monks in their cold scriptoria
jotted along the borders of the Gospels
brief asides about the pains of copying,
a bird signing near their window,
or the sunlight that illuminated their page-
anonymous men catching a ride into the future
on a vessel more lasting than themselves.
And you have not read Joshua Reynolds,
they say, until you have read him
enwreathed with Blake's furious scribbling.
Yet the one I think of most often,
the one that dangles from me like a locket,
was written in the copy of Catcher in the Rye
I borrowed from the local library
one slow, hot summer.
I was just beginning high school then,
reading books on a davenport in my parents' living room,
and I cannot tell you
how vastly my loneliness was deepened,
how poignant and amplified the world before me seemed,
when I found on one page
A few greasy looking smears
and next to them, written in soft pencil-
by a beautiful girl, I could tell,
whom I would never meet-
"Pardon the egg salad stains, but I'm in love."
8.31.2009
when all else fails, post a meme
The following meme is brought to you by Angie, aka lala, aka AngStudAng, aka Trigger. Please note that she will not answer to any of these.
Three nicknames I go by or nicknames others have given me:
1. bashtree
2. ash
Three jobs I have had in my life.
1. childcare assistant for CHBC's mothers morning out program
2. staff assistant, center for academic integrity
3. administrative coordinator, the als association
Three Places I have lived:
1. charlotte, nc
2. chapel hill, nc
3. richmond, va
Three Favorite drinks:
1. room-temperature water
2. white grape juice
3. vodka (shut up)
Three TV shows that I watch
1. so you think you can dance
2. guiding light (for the next couple of weeks that it's on) (also, stop judging)
3. in shape with sharon mann
Three Favorite Old Shows
1. that 70s show. i'm counting it as old, because it's no longer produced and it's set in the 70s
2. the match game (best game show ever)
3. that pyramid game with the words - $64,000 pyramid? i love old game shows.
Three Places I Have Been
1. st. petersburg, russia
2. san blas islands, off of panama
3. the ruins at ancient ephesus
Three people who e-mail/Facebook me regularly
1. lisa
2. chuck
3. stacey
Three of my favorite restaurants
1. sticky rice
2. hill cafe
3. city diner
Three things I am looking forward to
1. my next mac, whatever/whenever it may be
2. having a swanky downtown loft apartment (in my dreams)
3. getting another dog
Three Places I would like to visit
1. monticello
2. mt. vernon
3. blue ridge parkway
Three books I'd like to finish this year:
1. the way of a pilgrim
2. o come ye back to ireland
3. little heathens
Three Dreams:
1. multiple papillons
2. a long, happy marriage
3. a pile of quilts
Three living people I'd like to have dinner with my family:
1. kelly justice
2. john christopher
3. eddie izzard
Three life sweet events this week:
1. a volunteer bringing a special treat for me (little does he know what's in store for him!)
2. eli responding well to his new training and being much more cuddly and at ease and people-oriented
3. brian and his extremely good news - and the new demeanor he's had since hearing it
Three things I am grateful for:
1. a husband who's easy to love
2. people who want to take care of us
3. bark busters


